Just Decide
by Trojan'12
Summary: They both had known her for seven years. They both had gone through the quest of a lifetime with her. They both loved her. They both asked her to choose. Who will she decide? Her heart was set; it was her mind that was giving her the trouble.AffairFic/HHr
1. Chapter 1

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter One

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Another fic! Book 7 spoilers- but I'm ignoring that stupid epilogue. Again, this fic is something I haven't tried before. I hope it's up to par :]

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(July 31st; midnight)

"Ha! I made it again! Drink!"

"This isn't fair…" Hermione moaned, tilting her head away from the shot glass Harry was filling up in front of her.

Harry and Hermione were sitting next to each other at a muggle pub on the outskirts of London. Their booth was near the back of the pub, and facing away from the bar, so they hadn't been disturbed all night.

After about three hours, Hermione had done what she had promised, and drank down every hard liquor Harry had put in front of her. Even though it was muggle alcohol, Hermione was still completely pissed.

Harry was having the best time he'd had in a very long time.

"Rules are rules, Hermione. Now drink!" Harry lifted the glass of rum before her lips.

"You're using magic," she accused nimbly, still taking the glass.

Harry gave her a silly smile as she put the glass to her lips and tipped it back. She cringed as the liquid poured down her throat.

"Even if I have been using magic, you're still bloody awful at this game."

"I'm improving," she mumbled, trying to bounce another knut into the glass of beer in the middle of the table. The coin nicked against the table before flying to the left, missing the mug entirely.

Harry and Hermione glanced at each other before breaking out into a fit of laughter. Once their hysterics had died down to hushed giggles, Harry lifted his beer to his lips.

He frowned suddenly, "Bugger."

"Wha's wrong?" asked Hermione, leaning her head on Harry's shoulder. She had been becoming less and less stable as the night progressed.

"I'm tapped out."

"Aww, poor little Harry," Hermione cooed, pinching Harry's cheek.

"I guess this means that this place is no good to us anymore…"

"Oi!" a deep, grumpy voice sounded from behind their booth. Harry and Hermione peeked their heads around the seat to see who it was. Harry didn't miss how Hermione was practically on top of him, her hand braced firmly on his upper thigh. Suddenly the deep, grumpy voice became less interesting to him.

"We're closing up!"

"I bet you he read our minds or something," Hermione whispered to Harry as she was drawing back. Harry, however, was still focused on Hermione's hand.

Hermione followed his stare. "Oh, sorry…" she muttered, instantly blushing.

Harry didn't say anything, just looked up into her warm face. She looked absolutely gorgeous, even in a drunken stupor.

"Er, so should we get going?"

"Where?"

Hermione shrugged, "I dunno. Somewhere."

"'Kay." Harry led the way out of the booth and held a hand out for Hermione to take, knowing she'd probably need one. Realistically, she needed a few, because she ended up balancing her entire body against Harry's side.

Since their drinks had already been paid for, the grumpy bartender didn't bother them as they made their way out of the empty pub.

Outside, they were met with a midnight chill, so Hermione pressed deeper into Harry's embrace. He led the way across the street, and into the small neighborhood park.

"Park's so gloomy at night…" Hermione mumbled into Harry's chest.

"I'll protect you from them."

Hermione gasped, but Harry continued walking them forward, "From who?"

"I see dead people," Harry whispered to her eerily.

Hermione's glossy, faded eyes went wide, "Where?"

Harry pretended to look from side to side. "THERE!" he yelled suddenly, grabbing Hermione tightly.

"AHH!" Hermione screamed, jumping further into Harry's arms and wrapping her arms around his neck.

Harry howled with laughter, almost to the point of tears. Hermione drew her hands back from him with a stricken look on her face.

"Oh…"

Harry was on the ground now, holding his sides and rolling with hysterics.

"That was so not funny," Hermione continued, glaring daggers at him.

Harry pointed up at her while snickering, "You should have seen the look on your face!"

"The only reason I'm not killing you really hard right now, is because it's your birthday."

"Thank Merlin. I'd hate to go home with a few scratches on me."

Hermione's face dropped instantly. Her eyes went livid. Before Harry could get another word out, she dropped over him with her fists curled.

"Ah!" Harry shouted as Hermione's tiny hands started pounding into him, "Stop, you're tickling me!"

Harry managed to turn over, hoping to get a better a view of things when he stopped dead. Hermione was straddling him. His arms dropped from his face.

Hermione took advantaged of his dazed expression, and pinned his arms down. "Say you're sorry."

Harry didn't say anything and continued to stare at her. His heart was beating so fast, he thought that if he wasted any oxygen to say anything, then he'd pass out. He didn't think he would ever get the picture of Hermione looking down upon him, her tiny hands pressing down against him, out of his mind.

She shook him, "Say it!"

"S-Sorry…" Harry answered, starting to piece his mind back together.

Hermione grinned, "That's right."

Harry, too, smiled cheekily, "Not."

Hermione's face dropped instantly again. Before he could move a muscle, or even recognize Hermione's movements, she lifted her fist and punched him on the cheek.

Harry grabbed his jaw and stared up at Hermione in shock, "You hit me!"

She smirked triumphantly, "It hurts, doesn't it?"

Harry gave his jaw another rub, "Not at all."

Again, she glared at him, her mouth parted. Harry didn't know why, but that look in particular sparked something within him. He pushed himself up, his eyes trained on her lips, right as Hermione slid off him. Wobbling, she stood up.

"You're insufferable," she muttered, wiping off her knees. "I'm going home."

Harry frowned, seriously worried that he might have offended her.

"'Ey! You can't go home! It's still my birthday!"

"Happy bloody birthday…" she grumbled, stalking off across the lawn.

Harry scrambled to get up, feeling extremely light-headed as he did so, "Hermione! Hermione, wait."

Fortunately, Hermione did stop. Harry jogged up to her and grabbed onto her hand.

"Oh no…" she whispered blankly.

"Wha's sa matta?" Harry asked, pressing his other hand against his jaw. It did sort of hurt.

Hermione shook her head, "I can't go home…"

"Why not?"

"My parents…"

Harry chuckled, "I guess you gotta sleep in the park tonight!"

Hermione jumped as if she was startled, "No, don't leave me in the park! I can't sleep with dead people around!"

She threw her arms around Harry's neck and buried her head in his shoulder. Harry's heart pounded as he inhaled the scent from her hair. Vanilla and mint. Now he was definitely one step closer to passing out.

"I guess you could come back to my flat…"

Hermione didn't move from his neck, "That's a better idea."

Her hot breath against him was making all of his blood run south. He wasn't sure if he'd be embarrassed or not if Hermione started to feel his hard on. He could just say he was drunk…

Harry pulled her arms from around his neck, but held on to her left hand, "C'mon then. It's close…"

---

Harry's flat was just a few blocks away, in a more rural area of London. He had his private stairwell entry connected to an abandoned alley. It all seemed very Harry-ish. Or at least the Harry as of late; the one who _liked _his alone time.

Hermione had only been inside the flat once when Harry first bought it. It had been a brief visit with Ron, but what she remembered of the place was that it was beautiful inside.

Hermione stayed pressed against his shoulder as Harry opened the door and led them inside. He snapped, and the apartment instantly lit up.

"Jeez Harry…" Hermione said, getting a clear view of his spacious flat, covered in dirty laundry, garbage, pizza boxes, and quite a few firewhiskey bottles. She looked at him and nodded, "I like what you've done with the place."

"Er, yeah… I haven't had a lot of time to clean lately," he explained lamely, scratching at the back of his head.

Hermione frowned, "Really? What have you been doing?"

"You know, going out and stuff…"

For the past few weeks, every time Hermione and Ron invited Harry out or over to the Burrow, he had begged off saying he was decorating his flat. Every time they offered to come over and help, he said that he was tired and that he was just going to clean up and go to bed. Well, now she knew why he'd been so evasive. By the look on Hermione's face, she wasn't happy about the revelation at all.

"Gotten lucky with any girls, yet?" Hermione spat, more bitterly than the light tease she had intended.

Harry blinked repeatedly, "Hermione, it's not like that at all." And it wasn't. Honestly, all he had done was go out drinking. He'd met a few new muggle friends that he'd seen and hung out with over the weeks. There had been a couple cute girls also, but he hadn't done anything with them beyond kissing. It wasn't like he had brought any of them home with him. He wished he was capable of being so shallow.

Hermione looked embarrassed, "Er, right… so…"

"There's some clothes in my room that you can sleep in," Harry said, a little bashfully. He wasn't sure how he would react to seeing Hermione in his larger clothes, but he still had to offer.

"Where's your room?" Hermione asked enthusiastically.

"I thought you were the smartest witch of your age?" Harry jeered, crossing his arms across his chest.

Hermione scowled at him, "Harry…"

He laughed, "Alright, alright… I don't want you to tickle me again…"

Hermione used all her muscle to shove him as hard as possible. Gallingly, he barely had to take a step back. He flashed her a cheeky grin before she huffed and walked off into his flat. Just as she was about to open one door, Harry came up from behind her and grabbed her hand.

"It's this way, Sherlock." Harry tugged her down the hallway and passed an open library office that still looked like it was under construction. At the end of the corridor was a set of double doors. Harry led her straight through them.

His room looked much like the rest of the flat; an unkempt mess. Hermione didn't complain though. She loved the look of it- mostly because it was all so Harry.

Harry let go of her hand and walked to his closet in the corner. He took one of his old quidditch shirts off the hanger and then pulled out a pair of his black boxer briefs from his dresser. He handed them to Hermione.

"Here you go."

"Spank you," she said with a charming grin, her good mood inspired by the surroundings. Harry laughed and stood, watching her. He could feel the closeness already starting to strangle him.

Hermione set the clothes down on the bed and had just grabbed the hem of her blouse when she glanced back up to Harry.

"Turn around!"

"Okay…" Harry murmured, not moving an inch. Hermione didn't notice, and turned, facing the bed again.

If Harry thought he was going to pass out at the park, he was going to have a heart attack watching Hermione slowly lifting her shirt off her body. Every inch revealed was a new piece of skin to study and eventually dream about. Oh how he wanted her…

She struggled a bit trying to pull the shirt over her head, and for a moment Harry contemplated offering to help. He decided not to; after all he wasn't supposed to be watching.

Now that her top was completely gone, Harry recognized the strap hooked around her back was her bra. It was black. Might as well have been a Viagra pill.

Next, Harry heard Hermione unzipping and unbuttoning her jeans. He wished he could have done it for her, but the desire was forgotten as she began pushing her pants down her hips. If Harry thought he was going to have a heart attack watching her take off her top, then he was going to have both lungs fail watching her struggle with her pants.

Holy shit. Her knickers were black, too…

Just as she kicked her jeans off, she half glanced over her shoulder, not really looking, but acknowledging.

"Are you watching me?"

Harry couldn't bare to take his eyes off her, much less be embarrassed by her discovery.

"Yeah."

Hermione turned her head back and was quiet. For a long moment, Harry thought she was going to accuse him of being a pervert or something. But to his jaw-dropping pleasure, she turned around to face him.

"Do you like what you see?"

There weren't words to describe how he was feeling, or how hot and sexy Hermione looked. He knew he was going to sound like a fool either way, "A lot."

Hermione's cheeks tinged, yet she smiled. A few seconds passed before she shook her head and whispered, "I'm not ready to show him…"

Harry was slowly starting to work his eyes down her body, "Show who what?"

"I'm not ready to show Ron my body."

Her statement made Harry look up into her eyes. She looked uncomfortable even mentioning him, but maybe it was just the alcohol.

"Then don't. Ever."

"He says he's had feelings for me ever since fourth year. And that he's loved me so long that he thinks it's time to take the next step in our relationship… or something like that…"

"I wanted to kiss you in third year," Harry told her unabashedly. Since they were drunk, he might as well get some things out of his system… "When me and you were waiting for Lupin to turn into a werewolf."

"You did?" Hermione asked with a smile.

Harry nodded, "So bad."

"I wanted you to."

"Really?"

"Yes. You really became my best friend that night. I thought it would have been so romantic." Her eyes half-closed, as if remembering the night five years ago. Everything was much less complicated back then.

The silence engulfed them both for a while before Harry broke it with a laugh, "You know what this means?"

"You've like me longer than Ron," Hermione let out a laugh too.

"You're showing me you're body," Harry said quietly, after another pause.

Hermione stared into his eyes, "You weren't supposed to look."

Not even realizing it, Harry took a step towards her, "Are you mad at me?"

"No."

"Then I'm glad I did."

"I'm glad you like me."

He was surprised by her answer. By now, he couldn't control his tongue, "You're so sexy, 'Mione…"

"I am?" she asked, giving him a humbled look.

"So sexy…"

She smiled, "Thanks. You are too."

"You're just saying that 'cause I said it."

Hermione shook her head, "No, no, you really are. Everyone knows it."

"I only care that you think so. Your opinion's all that matters," Harry finished, giving her an intense look. A shiver ran up her spine, and she was spurred to say more.

"I have a lot of opinions," she muttered unthinkingly.

"About me?" Harry was only an inch away from her now. He was tracing a finger over the faint scar on her shoulder that she received at the Malfoy Mansion last spring.

Hermione's eyes drifted close, "They all revolve around you."

Without realizing, he bent down and kissed the scar, "Are they good?"

"They confuse me."

"Sorry."

"I don't know why I'm always thinking about you, Harry," she finally admitted, unwilling to open her eyes.

He laid a path of kisses from the scar, to the crook of her neck, "I think about you every minute."

"Why?"

Harry shrugged simply, "Because I don't want to think about anyone else."

"All I want is for you to be happy," she whispered, revealing another secret.

Harry's heart swelled. She was so beautiful; inside, out. "Right now, I'm the happiest I've been in a really, really long time."

Hermione let out a sigh as Harry sucked on her pulse point, "Because of me?"

"It's always because of you."

Harry kissed his way up to below her earlobe and then across her cheek. When he reached the corner of her lips, he opened his eyes and pulled away slightly. He wouldn't continue unless she wanted him to.

Hermione opened her eyes, the foggy haze gone from them. They stared at each other for the longest time before Harry felt a slight tugging coming from the center of his chest. He glanced downward.

It was Hermione's hand, pulling on his t-shirt.

Harry looked up again. When he met Hermione's eyes, he was also met with the burning, apparent desire blooming there. His nose was already pressing against her cheek. But he didn't kiss her.

Harry grazed his hands up her bare waist, staring into her eyes the entire time. When they passed over the sides of her breast, Hermione's eyes flickered slightly. Delicately, he slid down the straps of her bra and waited for her to make the next move.

Hermione bent her head down, and for a second Harry thought she was going to push away from him. Though, to his immense please, she worked her hands behind her and a second later, her bra fell to the floor. Shyly, Hermione looked back to him.

Her shy, insecure look was even sexier than her lusting one.

Harry didn't wait another second. He leaned in and kissed her on the lips.

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**Please you guys, leave a review and let me now your opinions! **


	2. Chapter 2

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter Two

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**[AN]: **We sort of back track in this chapter, but I hope you like it none the less! Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed last chapter! You have no idea how much all of those wonderful comments inspire me to write more!

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(8:30 p.m., July 31st; The Burrow)

"Ginny, we're over. I'm not saying that so you can chase me, alright? Please, just forget about me. Move on, I'll be fine."

Ginny Weasley defiantly shook her head, "How can you expect me to believe that? You've secluded yourself from everyone since the final battle."

Harry rolled his eyes. He was at his wit's end with this girl; not even his cup of firewhiskey was helping. "Not from everyone…"

"Harry, you need to know that people still care for you. Some even are in love with you," she said the last part so gently, like she was expecting for him to break down and confess his undying love for her as well.

However, Harry simply rolled his eyes once more, "Ginny, you're not in love with me."

"I am! What do you call waiting a year for you?"

"Not being able to let go. And that's exactly what you need to do."

"But you're not happy. I can't just walk away from what we had knowing that," she carried on. At this rate, Harry figured he could tell her he was actually a donkey, and she would still be under the impression that she loved him.

"Why not? I did. You remember after Dumbledore's funeral?" Harry ignored the flash of pain that crossed Ginny's face and tried to sound as corrosive as possible, "It's not up to you to make me happy."

"Well if I leave the job up to you, it'll never happen," she shot back folding her arms, a definite sign that she wasn't giving up anytime soon.

Harry smirked, "Probably."

"Why do you want me to give up on you, Harry? Seriously?" Great, she looked like she was trying to cry.

"Because I'm not a fucking charity case, Ginny!" Harry finally exploded, showing true emotion for the first time that night, "I'm a big boy, I can take care of my bloody self!"

"But I-"

"Ginny… I don't have any feelings for you anymore. You need to find someone that'll care about you as much as you care about them."

Ginny stood there, red in the cheeks, looking like she had been slapped both ways. Finally she scoffed, "Fine. But I'm taking your advice. So when you change your mind, I won't be here waiting for you!"

Harry wanted to laugh, but settled for going back to his suave, uncaring attitude, "That's not likely to happen…"

"You're pathetic Harry. You keep this attitude up and pretty soon no one will care about you at all."

Harry rolled his eyes and waved his finger in little circles, "Woo-hoo."

Ginny huffed one last time, before turning and stomping back into the house. Harry got a few more minutes of peace and quiet before he recognized the sound of the kitchen door opening and closing again. He sighed, thinking that one of the Weasley clan was on their way down to ring Harry's neck.

"Hey."

Harry jerked his head up, "Hermione?"

"Yeah. Ginny ran up stairs crying and huffing so I figured it had something to do with you," she explained, leaning against the tree. She looked absolutely beautiful, and for no specific reason. It was just Hermione, and for him, that was reason enough.

"If she's crying, it's her own fault. I didn't say anything different than what I've been saying for the past two months," he replied, not trying to sound rude, but coming off very much so.

Hermione sighed, "I tried to tell her to back off this morning, but she completely took it the wrong way. I'm sorry."

Harry shrugged dismissively, "I'm not."

"Yeah, but it's your birthday and everything…"

"This party was a bad idea. I told you and Ron that when you started planning it," Harry told her matter-of-factly. And it was true. He never wanted to deal with a birthday party, or all the fake smiles and laughs that went along with it.

Hermione wasn't deterred, "We just thought it'd be nice to get you back in a family atmosphere. I mean, you've kind of been ignoring me and Ron…"

Harry shook his head, his anger reaching boiling point again, "Why does everyone think they know what's best for me? If it was anybody else, it'd be just fine that they went a few weeks without seeing their friends. But if it's Harry Potter, that means he's depressed. Can't I ever have a fucking break?"

Hermione ignored his last sentence, "Are you?"

"Am I what?" he asked her curtly.

"Depressed?"

"Maybe I just don't like being a third wheel to you two. Have you ever thought about that?" he asked, scowling at her.

Hermione looked sadder than he expected her to be, "Look, Ron doesn't need to ask me to go do things with you. If you want to spend more time with him-"

"I'm not talking about Ron," Harry cut her off, now staring at his empty cup instead of her beautiful, concerned eyes.

"Me?"

"Has it occurred to you that this is the first conversation we've had just between the two of us since Ron left the tent last winter?" he asked her in a small voice.

Hermione's face fell, "I'm so sorry Harry…"

"I wasn't trying to make you feel guilty," he shrugged.

"Well… what if we were all to go out? Just the three of us, like it used to be. We won't make you feel like a third wheel, I promise."

Harry scoffed, "Yeah right. Like Ron's not going to show you off every chance he gets…"

Hermione was silent for a moment. To be honest, she didn't like the way Ron flaunted her either.

"It's sort of his happy ending, you know?" she said, trying to defend her boyfriend, "Seven years of being Harry Potter's sidekick, he finally comes out on top with the girl…"

Harry rolled his eyes, "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say."

Hermione narrowed her eyes and glared hard at him. Harry sighed, "Fine. Let's go out then."

Hermione gave him a big smile, "It'll be fun, Harry. None of the extra bullshit."

"Did you just say bullshit?" he asked, dropping his pithy tone.

"Yup," Hermione nodded, giving him a proud grin.

"Excuse me for reading through the lines too much, but did you just refer to your's and Ron's relationship as 'extra bullshit'?"

Hermione swatted him over the head, "That's not what I was referring to."

"Damn, I got my hopes up."

Hermione gave him a strange look, during which Harry couldn't meet her eyes. He cursed himself for slipping up.

"Um, so should we go tell Ron?"

Harry really thought about it. Spending the night with her and Ron, who would no doubt be trying to kiss and cuddle her all night, no matter what Hermione said against it? Not exactly his cup of tea. He probably still had time to get out of it…

"I don't-"

"HERMIONE?! Oh, there you are!" Ron's voice shouted.

Harry and Hermione both turn to see Ron trotting down from the Burrow's kitchen.

"Hey babe, I've been looking for you," Ron slapped an arm around Hermione's waist and pulled her into him. He was leaning in to kiss her when he noticed Harry, "Oh, er, both of you. What's up mate? Didn't like the cake or something?"

"Um, Harry- well _I_- had the idea that we should all go out and do something. Just us."

"Can we do it tomorrow? Dad said that I have to stay in. Remember, I'm going with him to the Ministry tomorrow morning?" he asked her, like he was trying to keep the conversation just between them. Harry noticed that he did it all the time when he was around. While he would never tell, it annoyed the living hell out of him.

"Oh, right…" Hermione nodded.

"I was just coming to say good night."

"Good night," she replied, giving him a little smile. The kind of smile you would give your sick grandmother, Harry thought.

Harry watched with scowling eyes as Ron leaned in to kiss Hermione. She turned her head, thinking that he was going to kiss her cheek. Ron followed her lips, right as Hermione was turning her head back. The awkwardness continued for a few more seconds before Ron finally grabbed her shoulders, and pecked her on the lips.

Harry covered his snicker.

"Night then," Hermione mumbled, now blushing.

"Night. Happy Birthday, mate," he added to Harry, slapping him on the back.

Harry simply waved him goodbye as Ron sent one last look to Hermione, and then turned back on the path to the house. Hermione glanced uncomfortably at Harry.

"So I guess you'll be going home too?"

"No. I said we'd go out. Just because Ron can't doesn't mean I can't," she told him indifferently.

Harry looked up with genuine surprise, "Really?"

"Yeah. So where do you want to go?"

Harry stared at her for a few moments, waiting for her to make some excuse to escape from going. Time went by, and Hermione still stared at him expectantly.

"Well?"

Harry racked his brain for a decent activity, "Uh, how about the pub?"

Hermione gave him a searching look, "Haven't you had enough to drink tonight?"

"Not really. Plus, I'm more interested in watching you drink for the first time in your goody-two-shoe'd life," Harry said mockingly, with an impish grin.

"Hey! I've drank before."

"Champagne and butterbeer doesn't count, sweetheart," Harry responded, smirking.

Hermione gave him one of her most determined looks, "You don't think I can handle hard liquor?"

Harry sucked in a deep breath, like he was getting ready to explain exactly what he thought. A second later, he blew the breath out, "Nope."

Hermione looked like she was one step away from putting her hands on her hips and screaming Harry's ear off. Much to his surprise, she simply shrugged, "Which pub are we going to, then?"

This time, Harry looked at her imploringly, "You sure?"

"Positive."

"Alright, let's go…"

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**Please take the time to ****REVIEW****!**

Next chapter really kicks us off into the present- well, the 'morning after' at least.

**;]**


	3. Chapter 3

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter Three

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**[AN]: **Sorry for the wait! This chapter starts us into the present (morning after)-- I hope you guys enjoy!

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(Harry's flat ; 11:52 a.m.)

Harry wasn't at all surprised when he woke up the next morning and found the other half of his bed empty. Although, he was disappointed. He didn't think that after how amazing last night was, Hermione would be so quick to just run off. He thought she would have at least lingered for a little bit.

Sadly, it seemed that Harry would have to be doing some clean up after last night's events.

He let out a deep sigh as he pushed himself up from his bed, letting the wrinkled sheets fall from his naked chest. Glancing over to digital clock on his night stand, he saw that it was almost twelve in the afternoon. He knew that Hermione had a class at 10:30 every morning, and then hung out in the university library after to do her homework.

Harry figured that in a crowded library on her school campus would be the perfect place to confront her. Because, there was no way that Harry was just going to let her get away from him now. Especially not after they had taken each other's virginities. He was positive that Hermione went crazy when she woke up this morning, and had probably already compiled a list of how wrong their actions were. However, Harry wanted to make her see his side of things. He had to show her how _right_ last night felt for him.

…

(University of Westminster Library; 12:23 p.m.)

Hermione was sitting at her usual table in the expansive library. Bright light was spilling in from the large, uncovered windows, and was murdering her eyes. She was already dealing with a pounding headache, but her hangover apparently wasn't letting her get off easy.

She rubbed at her tired eyes for the millionth time that day, before again trying to refocus on her text book. Her economics professor had assigned them to read two chapters from the book, and so far she had read about two pages. _This_ was why Hermione didn't drink. The other reason attesting to why she should stay sober was a topic that she had refused to think about all morning. Surprisingly enough, she had been doing a good job in keeping both of her best friends absent from her mind so far today.

That was until someone stepped in front of her desk and cast a shadow over her text book. When Hermione glanced up to see who was there, her mouth fell open.

"Hermione," Harry whispered, "I-"

"Harry, what are you doing here?" Hermione asked, slamming her text book close and bringing it up against her chest. Harry rolled his eyes at her apparent shield. He had seen all of her last night-- why was she even bothering?

"I was wondering if we could talk about last night," Harry explained quietly. Even though he was upset at her actions this morning, he couldn't help but look at her tenderly. Now that he had been so intimate with Hermione, he'd probably never be able to look at her the same. Though to him, that wasn't a bad thing.

Hermione let out a forced laugh as she avoided Harry's eyes by starting to gather her belongings from the table, "Oh yeah, last night must have been crazy. I can't remember a bloody thing. If that's all then I should really be getting off to my philosophy class-"

Just as she was standing up and slinging her book bag over her shoulder, Harry stepped forward and grabbed her arm firmly, "Hermione we have to talk."

Still, she didn't meet his eyes. Biting her lip, she mumbled, "Do we have to? I'm kind of busy-"

Harry sighed, "You know we're going to have to talk about last night sooner or later. I know you know what happened. It- it was-"

Finally Hermione relented, "Look, I know." She did a quick check to make sure no one around them was watching or close enough to hear before she turned back to Harry, "Last night was a huge mistake. I agree that it's best if we just forget about it…"

"That wasn't what I was going to say," Harry said quickly, narrowing his eyes.

Hermione frowned, "It wasn't?"

"No."

"Well… I mean, what else could you have to say?"

Harry stared her straight in the eyes for a few seconds before releasing his grip on her upper arm. For a brief second, Hermione thought he was just going to leave. However, Harry's hand trailed down her arm and grabbed onto her free hand. He laced his fingers through hers before turning and heading back through the open library. Although she was a little intimidated by his facade, Hermione followed obediently behind him.

Harry led them off through the library's desks and bookshelves, over to a storage room he had spotted on his way into the place. Looking around, Harry grabbed onto the locked door handle, and with a quick spark of wandless magic, twisted it open and walked in, Hermione in tow.

Once they were both inside, Harry let go of her and turned to lock the door. Hermione threw her book bag off into the corner and then turned back to give Harry an expectant look.

Harry's eyes didn't flicker the slightest from hers as he started to speak, "I've been hoping that last night would happen for a long time now, Hermione."

She immediately frowned, "You've been hoping that we'd get wasted and betray Ron?"

"I've been waiting for a chance to show you how I really felt," Harry returned, ignoring the bitterness in her last remark.

Hermione shifted on her feet, "W-what are you talking about?"

"I remember every bit of last night, and I don't regret any of it."

"Harry…" She took a step back, crossing her arms over her chest.

Harry fearlessly took a step forward, "And if I'm being honest, I think you weren't as drunk as you seemed either."

"I was too! How dare you-"

"Hermione," Harry cut her off, "I'm putting my heart on my sleeve here- the least you could do is not lie to me."

Hermione stared at him for a long moment before softly shaking her head, "I'm with Ron, Harry. Our best friend."

Harry took another step for her, also shaking his head, "You don't love him though."

"I can learn to-"

He scoffed, "Isn't the whole point of being in a relationship is because you have _equally_ mutual feelings for each other?"

"I don't really know," Hermione replied, starting to get heated over Harry's attitude, "I've never dated anyone before. But what makes you such an expert?"

"Nothing, it's just the most rational answer. I thought someone like you would have known so," he spat scathingly. He hadn't intended to attack Hermione once he got her alone, but if bombarding her with the harsh truth was the only way to get through to her, then he was willing to try anything.

Hermione glared daggers at him, "Are you calling me irrational?"

"Yes!" Harry shouted, pointing a finger at her, "Because if you were a rational person, than you would know that you shouldn't have to be with a bloke just to make _him and other people _happy!"

Hermione's mouth fell open in shock, but she quickly recovered, "Oh, so that's why you think I'm with Ron?"

Harry stepped forward so that he was only a few inches away from her face, "I know that's why you're with him. You never had the guts to actually question your own hesitation-"

"Why the hell are you assuming that I was hesitant to start dating him?" Hermione yelled, her frustration hitting a boiling point. Who did Harry think he was questioning her logic and relationship with Ron?!

"Because I fucking know you Hermione Granger! You may have had a _small crush_, but deep down you've been unsure about being with him from the start."

Hermione sneered, "No I wasn't-"

"If you really weren't, then last night would have never happened," Harry said lowly in a mocking tone.

"It shouldn't have happened!" Hermione screamed, about ready to tear her hair out.

Harry raised an eyebrow, "But it did because you wanted it to."

Hermione took a daring step forward, and this time pointed a finger at him, "I did not go to that pub last night with any hope that I would cheat on my boyfriend and sleep with his best mate! What is it Harry, because you're the Boy-Who-Lived, and you're so high and mighty that any girl would jump into bed with you? You can't always have you're way, you selfish prat!"

Harry's hands were starting to curl into fists, "Don't you think I know that I can't always have my way?! And for your information, I've never wanted any other girl to sleep with me."

"Well that girl can't be me," Hermione said with a stubborn look in her eye.

Harry smirked uncharacteristically, "That girl _was_ just you. And deep down we can both agree how amazing being together was."

Hermione raised her hand at Harry's face, but he caught it before she could strike him.

"Do not hit me," he bit out through clenched teeth.

Hermione tried to slap him with her other hand, but Harry caught it again. He backed her up into the wall so she couldn't wiggle out of his grasp. As if to mock her, Harry pressed his body into hers.

Hermione glared at him, completely frustrated, "Don't tell me what to do."

"Nobody tells you what to do…" Harry spoke, his lips an inch away from hers.

Hermione tried to shake her head to deter his sudden closeness. She could feel herself slowly being sucked in to his wrath, but was desperately trying to resist. The truth was that she _did_ remember every part of last night. She remembered the sounds he made as he kissed her and the pain she felt when he finally took her. She remembered allowing him to do those things to her, and that alone was what scared her the most. Even though she had a boyfriend, she found herself being pulled towards another man. Her boyfriend's best friend, no less. What kind of a woman was she?

"Don't make me hate you, Harry," she whispered, feeling like it was the last thing she could say to get him to go.

Harry stayed firmly pressed against her, "Yeah? Is that why your heart's beating so fast? Because you're feeling _hatred_ for me?"

Hermione's lips fell apart slightly, her eyes still narrowed. It was a mistake on Hermione's part because Harry's focus went from glaring into her eyes to staring illustriously at her mouth. Before he knew it, Harry had leaned all the way forward and pressed his lips against hers. Hermione made a muffled noise in the back of her throat, but was instantly silenced as Harry pushed his tongue into her mouth.

It was an uphill battle for Hermione not to wrap her arms around Harry's neck and give in to the kiss, and eventually she did surrender to her instincts. She grabbed Harry's face and pulled him even deeper into the heated kiss.

Harry's body was already jumping at Hermione's every touch, and he could practically feel his blood running south. He tore away from the kiss and latched his mouth onto Hermione's neck as his hands started to tug at the hem of Hermione's shirt. Hermione's mouth formed into the shape of an 'o' as Harry's tongue swept over her pulse and his fingers grazed over her skin.

"My flat…" she heard Harry grunt as his fingers reached down to her belt buckle. Hermione couldn't think of anything to do but nod as she watched Harry make quick work of her belt. Suddenly, the conversation they had about her being an unavailable girl seemed like an extremely distant memory. Honestly, right now she probably wouldn't even be able to remember her boyfriend's name if asked. All there was, was Harry and her, and whatever was about to transpire between them as he apparated the both of them away to his flat.

When their feet touched back on solid ground, Harry stumbled forward and pressed Hermione's back into the foyer wall. Hermione let out another stifled moan as Harry gripped the back of her thighs and hoisted her up.

She wrapped her legs around his waist automatically, too caught up in the motions of everything to be thinking about anything else. Still clutching onto her, Harry moved them from the wall and started walking them down the hallway towards his room. They didn't relent from their passionate kiss as Harry turned the corner and kicked open his bedroom door. As soon as Harry slammed her down on the bed and hovered over her, Hermione started tugging at his jeans.

Both rushed to remove their clothes so that they didn't have to spend an extra moment away from their intense kiss. Harry seemed to be the most impatient to have her, even though they both had satisfied themselves only hours prior. Hermione didn't seem to mind though as he eagerly ripped at her knickers before throwing them off into the corner of the room.

Harry's lips crashed against Hermione's as he pushed into her. She let out a high moan at the sudden pain-filled pleasure, but Harry barely recognized her stifled sound as he continued to thrust.

He didn't want to be gentle, like he had last night. This time, he wanted Hermione to know how good he made her feel. He wanted Hermione to see how much they wanted _and _needed each other.

…

"This can't keep happening," Hermione whispered in a sad breath.

She didn't turn to look back at Harry from her position on the edge of his bed. After their first time, it wasn't long before Harry was initiating round two. Hermione was so dazed from her mind-racking orgasm that she didn't have enough energy to protest. However, after her second bout of ecstasy, the implications of their actions seemed to hit her full force. Quickly, she had slid out of bed and started to gather her clothes, all while the voice in her head was ripping her to shreds.

What kind of person was she? After the horrible and disgusting mistake she had made last night with Harry, here she was doing it again! She wasn't worthy of anyone's love, much less Ron's!

"Why not?" Harry asked still laying in bed, folding his hands behind his head.

Hermione finally turned and glared at his nonchalance, "Don't be stupid, Harry."

"I'm not being stupid. Why can't we keep doing this?" he continued, imitating her look jeeringly. Honestly, he didn't understand why Hermione was so focused on the negative. Why couldn't she just realize how much she wanted _him_. Why couldn't that be enough for her? Bloody hell, why did she have to worry about other people so much!

Hermione nearly curled her fists at him. What the hell was Harry playing at? Since when was he so selfish? "Because I'm with another bloke! You remember Ron, your best friend? Do you have any idea how hurt he'd be if he found out about this?" she shouted at him, hoping to knock some sense into him.

Harry simply shrugged, "Then break it off with him."

She froze for a second, letting his suggestion wash over her. For a moment, his idea seemed plausible, but then she found herself shaking her head, "I can't."

"Why not?"

"Harry, I can't just break up with him!"

"Yes you can," Harry told her, sitting up from the bed and giving her anything but a gentle look, "Your relationship is practically ruined anyway. And plus, you don't even like him."

Hermione scowled, "I do too like him."

"You romantically like him about as much as I romantically like him," Harry snorted.

Hermione sighed and put her head in her hands. Harry couldn't understand what was so difficult about breaking up with Ron. Would she rather lead him on, until he did discover them like this?

"Hermione?" Harry whispered a few minutes later.

"What?"

"Can you honestly say you're happy with Ron?"

Hermione looked up, "Yes."

The blood in Harry's veins ran cold. After all of his ridiculing and harsh words, she still wasn't ready to admit that she didn't want to be with Ron. At least, that's what Harry convinced himself it was. He wouldn't even let himself think over the possibility that Hermione really didn't want to be with _him._

Harry couldn't stop himself from glaring at her as he continued his tirade, "Then why haven't you done this with him yet?"

Hermione's cheeks tinged pink, "Because, it's- I'm- I…"

"Because it'd be like shagging your brother?" Harry asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No!" she quickly denied.

Harry smirked at her, "I've seen how awkward it is when you and him kiss. You never want it. With me and you, it's natural. We can't help ourselves."

"Kissing Ron is only awkward when I'm around you," Hermione shot back angrily. As soon as the words left her mouth though, she knew she shouldn't have said them. That fact would only give him more ammo.

"Why?" Harry asked smiling, "Because you're afraid of what I think?"

"No…"

Harry scooted forward on the bed until he was only a few inches away from her face. "Since you're so curious, I hate it when he touches you," he said quietly.

Hermione bit her lip as she shook her head, "Ron is my boyfriend. He's allowed to touch me all he wants."

Again, Harry glared at her stubbornness, "Yeah? Well, I'll let you in on a little well known secret; he wants to touch you like I've touched you for the past twenty-four hours."

Hermione looked away, shaking her head. She didn't want to talk about it, but that only made Harry say more, "Are you ready to let that happen? Are you ready for him to be inside you?"

"Shut up, Harry!" Hermione yelled.

Harry smirked once more, "I'll take that as a no."

Hermione could only shake her head to try and subdue her growing fury, "Steps like that take time in serious relationships! And I'm sure when that day comes for me and Ron, that it'll be wonderful, and realistic, and genuine!" She screamed her last sentence in a way to make it more convincing, both for Harry and herself. Who was she kidding? Even now, the thought of sex with Ron made her cross her legs and make a sour face.

_But_, she couldn't stand Harry being so assumptive. Or all-knowing for that matter. Who was he to rub it in her face? For all she knew, she _could _be happily having sex with Ron in a few months, or a years time.

Subtly, Hermione crossed her legs as Harry continued in his scornful tone, "Like us having sex isn't wonderful, realistic, or genuine…"

That was enough. She had enough of Harry picking on her. As derisively as possible, she scoffed, "It isn't. Because it's just that- sex. It'll never mean anything."

Well, her plan worked. Instead of arguing back, Harry gave her a strangled look, "It doesn't mean anything to you?"

She swallowed before shaking her head, "No."

Before Hermione could do so much as blink, Harry threw the sheets off him and got up from the bed. He stalked over to the door and opened it, "Go then."

"W-what?" Hermione stuttered, surprised by the look of revulsion in his eyes.

"Leave," Harry bit out.

"Harry-"

"If you don't care about me, then I'm not going to force you to stay here."

Her breath caught in her throat as he finished. Immediately, she found herself taking a gentler tone, "Harry! How could you think I don't care about you? You know how much I do!"

Harry shot her another glare, this time also filled with pain. Hermione could practically see the wall Harry was mentally building within himself. "Enough to sleep with me and then tell me it doesn't mean anything to you. That's real classy Hermione," Harry sneered.

The idea of being gentler with him immediately vanished. Hermione was appalled by what he was saying to her, and couldn't help the onslaught of insults she said next, "Me classy? Look at you! You're showing no remorse that we just betrayed Ron. You could care less that we just broke his heart."

Harry rolled his eyes, "He doesn't know about it! And no, I wouldn't care because I know it wouldn't break his heart, it would only piss him off. To have your heart broken you have to give your heart to someone, and trust that they'd never hurt you. Ron has no idea of what that really entails!"

"And you wonder why I started up with Ron and not you. You're so fucking selfish! Whenever someone else is happy and you're not, you have to find some way to take the happiness from them!" Hermione screamed in conviction, even though she knew there was hardly any truth to what she was saying. However, she was too caught up in her anger- she wanted to make Harry feel some of the pain he was making her experience, "Do yourself a favor Harry, and stop expecting that other people will be tripping over themselves to make sure you're okay! Either grow up or find some other girl to constantly satisfy you. I'm bloody tired of this!"

"Get out."

Hermione's breath hitched at the look in Harry's eyes. She had never before seen that look, or shade of black green before. Honestly, he looked like he was ready to kill.

She instantly regretted saying the hurtful words. But all she wanted was to hurt him, like he had hurt her. He just didn't understand how difficult it was; that's what had made her angry. For a second, she wondered if he was going to hit her, but quickly shook it off.

Various objects around the room began to shake. Hermione figured she'd better just go before any more damage could be done. Quietly, she gathered up her jacket and shoes from the floor, before walking past him and out of the door.

Harry slammed it shut as soon as she was gone.

---

**Okay, we end on a bad note, but I promise next chapter will be a little better. I know some of you have your qualms about Hermione and Harry cheating on Ron, (trust me, I used to be against it as well), but that is the path I chose in this fic. I don't want to give any concrete details away, but please remember the warning that this is an ****Affair Fic****. **

**Lastly, please take the time to review! Seriously, you can copy and paste one word ten times for all I care-- just give me a little insight on how the story's doing for you.**

**:]**

Oh by the way, check out my new fic **At Shell Cottage**!


	4. Chapter 4

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter Four

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**[AN] **Seriously, you guys are AMAZING! Thank you so much for the supportive reviews! Oh, and thank you for being patient with me. Sorry it's taken so long.

---

(La Pitch Night Club; 10:48 p.m.)

The loud, toneless music that the DJ had been playing for the last hour or so, was really starting to get on Hermione's nerves. She didn't want to be at this stupid club anymore. Even though it was pretty dark in there, she didn't want to be out in public where her friends and others could see what a miserable mood she was in.

Trying to distract herself from the dancing couples and the terrible music, Hermione lifted her cup to her lips. Her face scrunched up after getting a small taste of the drink Ron had given her. He _knew_ how much she hated vodka.

Out of nowhere, two arms snaked around Hermione's waist, and pulled her back into a hard chest. Startled out of her reverie, she turned with an appalled expression, only to see the face of her boyfr- well, Ron.

"Hey!" he greeted, clearly more drunk than he was when he left about fifteen minutes ago to go talk to some of his mates, "We're all going to go back to Dean and Seamus' flat. You're coming right?"

"Um, I-" Hermione had glanced away, trying to figure out the best way to say no, when a messy head of hair suddenly caught her attention.

"Hermione?"

Hermione's mouth fell open slightly, "Is- is that?" She was staring hard at the corner of the bar, trying to recognize the face of this person. He was turned around, facing the bar, so all she could see was his hair and the few girls hanging off his arm. Her stomach went sour.

Ron tried to follow her gaze, "Who is it?"

"Harry," Hermione answered blankly. At the bar, Harry had turned around and threw one of his arms over the skimpiest girl of them all. Her chest looked so fake, it was like she was about to tip over.

Hermione watched as Harry laughed with some of the other blokes standing around him. She could tell he was wasted.

"Oh…" Ron muttered, going quiet, "that does look like Harry."

By now, Hermione's eyes had narrowed into slits as she continued to stare up at the boy she had been thinking solely about for the past few weeks. He looked like he was having the time of his life with those slags.

"That _is _Harry. I thought you said he was staying home tonight?" Hermione questioned, turning her glare on Ron. The first thing she'd asked Ron when he invited her out was if he had invited Harry as well. Harry was supposed to be busy at home tonight.

He fidgeted, "Er, yeah, h-he did say that."

"Then what the hell is he doing here with all those skanks?"

Ron was silent for a moment before he let out a breath and shrugged, "I dunno Hermione… maybe he just doesn't want to hang out with us anymore." He grabbed her hand and started tugging her off in the direction of the exit. When Hermione didn't budge, he looked back.

"You coming?"

After a moment, Hermione shook her head, "I- I'm going to go talk to Harry. He looks like he might need someone to walk him _home_."

Ron sighed impatiently, "Hermione, he's been really stressed out. Let the bloke have his fun. I'm sure he'll come around sooner or later…"

Again, Hermione glared, "You call fun getting involved with some disease ridden slag, Ron?"

"Wha- well… I mean- not for me! For Harry."

"Goodnight Ron. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Hermione pulled her hand free and was pushing her way through the crowd, in Harry's direction. She felt a hand on her shoulder, pulling her back and was about to turn and give Ron the telling of his life if he didn't let her go.

Surprisingly, he looked compliant, "Here, let me talk to him."

"Are you sure?" Hermione asked with a slight frown.

He nodded, but didn't look too ecstatic over his offer, "Yeah, I'll be right back."

"Get him to come with us!" Hermione shouted after him, "And don't let him bring those stupid girls!"

Ron turned and held his hands up in front of him, the universal sign for Hermione to calm down. Hermione didn't completely relax, but stopped shouting commands as Ron got closer and closer to Harry's entourage.

Finally, Ron reached them. Harry's head lolled lazily over to Ron with his acknowledgement. A few moments passed in which they shared a few words, and then suddenly, Harry turned and looked at Hermione dead in the eyes. She recoiled slightly, but didn't look away from him. It was obvious that he was glaring at her.

A few more moments passed. Harry had looked away from her and resumed the awkward conversation with Ron. Hermione could see Harry starting to shake his head, but then gave Ron a sharp look. His eyes darted back to Hermione before he nodded his head.

Hermione's heart started pounding as she watched Harry get up from the bar, say something to the group of whores, and then follow Ron back through the crowd. Hermione was focusing so hard on Harry, she ignored the unpleasant look on Ron's face.

"Hey babe," Ron greeted, putting on an enthusiastic smile. "So Harry's going to come back to Dean and Seamus' too. Isn't that cool?"

Hermione bit her lip, staring straight at Harry's face, "Yeah. Hi Harry."

Harry didn't say anything. Finally, he nodded at her.

"Well let's get a move on then. I think they're all still waiting outside the club for us…" Ron instantly took up Hermione's hand as he led them off to the exit.

---

Their group of friends from the club were all crowded into Seamus and Dean's little flat. Everyone was gathered around the couch, where Hermione had prompted for Ron to tell them the story of working with Charlie and his dragon at Gringotts.

Her motive was to get everyone interested in the story, so that they wouldn't notice her slip off to the kitchen, were currently Harry was pouring himself another drink.

As soon as she entered the room, Harry's back stiffened. She sighed, but continued to move forward.

"Harry? Can we talk?"

Harry was obviously refusing to say anything, so she continued, "Look, I- I'm sorry for what I said last time. I really didn't mean it, Harry, I was just…angry…"

Harry slammed back another drink, but didn't turn to face her.

"So… have you been okay? No one's heard from you, and you didn't look too great at the club. Who were all those people anyway?"

Harry snorted. Finally, he turned around and glared at her, "You told me to find another girl that satisfied me. I found a few."

Hermione started stammering, her face slowly going red, "You- you've… did you.. W-with-" A flame of jealousy spread throughout Hermione's body. The thought that another girl- whore- had been with Harry, like the way she had, so intimately, so close- it made her curl her hands into fists.

Harry let out a laugh, "Sucks, huh?"

"What?"

He looked at her coldly, "Sucks to hear that the person you want is happy with someone else. Doesn't it?"

"Are you happy?" Hermione asked with bated breath. For the first time in her life, she honestly hoped the answer would be no.

Harry concentrated on playing with his drink, "Are you?"

Hermione sucked in a deep breath while Harry gave her a sideways glance. "No. I miss you, Harry," she took another step closer so that she was just under his chin. She looked up to meet his intense gaze, "In both ways…"

Harry didn't say anything. He struggled to keep the hard look in his eyes as Hermione opened her mouth to continue.

"Look, I lied last time, okay? It meant something to me. Means something to me…" she corrected, reaching her hand out for his, "I knew it then, but I'm admitting it now."

Harry looked down to stare Hermione fully in the eyes. He was trying to weed away at anything that might hint she was making it up.

There was a chorus of laughter from the living room and Ron walked into the kitchen a few seconds later, wearing a huge grin. Hermione quickly pulled her hand back.

"Hey you two. What's going on- the party's in there!" Ron walked up and threw an arm around Hermione's waist.

"You okay?" he asked her directly.

"Um, no actually. I was just telling Harry that I'm not feeling well. I think I'm just going to go home for the night." Hermione gazed at Harry as she said the last part.

"Oh, come on Hermione. You've been doing this all the time lately! Just stay for another hour or so…"

Hermione shook her head, "Sorry Ron. I'm really tired anyway. Why don't you go tell them about Mr. Inkwell congratulating you over Charlie…"

"Okay, well… good night," Ron leaned in with his lips puckered. Hermione quickly turned her head, while covering her mouth with her hand.

"Um, I might be contagious Ron. Night," Hermione left before she could unwillingly look at Ron's face- or worse, Harry's. Harry watched with intense eyes as she hurried out of the kitchen.

"I think she's really coming down with something nasty," Ron muttered after her. He turned back to Harry who was still staring at the spot where Hermione had disappeared down the hallway.

"You alright, mate?"

Harry jerked his head back to Ron with a questioning look. "Huh?"

"You look like your mind's somewhere else," Ron told him, attempting a comfortable smile. He was unsure how to act when Harry was like this and drinking. Sadly, the red head hadn't gotten the chance to know this side of his best friend.

Harry was dead quiet for a solid minute. His eyes had reverted back to the spot where Hermione had left, practically giving him an invitation to something that he wanted so desperately for the past few weeks. Her.

"Actually Ron," he started, setting his drink on the counter, "I just remembered I had some errands to run tonight. See you later," he finished, like it was something he was only accustomed to saying rather than a sincere departure.

"See ya," Ron replied. Harry hadn't heard him, as he was in too much of a hurry to get out of this small flat before anyone else noticed. Ron sighed as he stood alone in the tiny kitchen. He had been feeling more and more hopeless towards his best mate over the past few months. Harry had changed, but he wasn't making any effort to get his life back on track.

However sad Ron was that he had lost the male comradery, he was happy that the other member of the trio stuck with him. Since Harry wasn't around that much anymore, Hermione could direct all of her attention at him, like he deserved. At least Ron could come out of the past few difficult years with some sort of glory.

Or so he thought he had.

---

Harry appeared next to the closet in his bedroom with a faint '_pop'_. A hint of vanilla and mint tinged the air; automatically his back stiffened. He told himself to not breathe heavily, even though that was his natural reaction. He didn't want to let her know how much she affected him. She might just use it against him…

Composed, Harry turned around to see Hermione getting up from the edge of his bed. Since his expression didn't give anything away, Hermione gave him a cautious look with fragile eyes.

She opened her mouth, trying to find the words to say something. Obviously, she didn't realize how it tortured Harry. His face glazed over with a renewed, hardened look.

"D-did you really do anything with those girls?" she finally asked.

Harry narrowed his eyes; half angry, half happy that she was jealous, "I could have if I wanted to. You have no right to tell me I can't."

Hermione bit her lip, relieved, "I know. I'm glad you didn't though- I mean, none of them looked right for you."

"I guess nobody's right for me," he snarled at her, abruptly turning and walking into his closet. She had some fucking nerve! Now, he wished he really had gone through with the blonde one who kept throwing herself at him all bloody night long. It didn't matter that she sounded smarter than a garden hose- maybe he just needed someone new to shag. Someone who had no idea who he was or what he liked-

Harry had just started pulling off his jacket when he felt a pair of small hands on his shoulder, doing it for him. Hermione stood behind him and gently eased his coat off his shoulders, before throwing it off to the side. Harry stood frozen, facing his hung clothing, while Hermione stayed behind him, about an inch away from his skin. Her hands remained on his back.

"I'm sorry for hurting you, Harry. But I really have missed you so much…" she whispered. She paused for a second, hoping that he would reply, but when he didn't she bent forward and pressed her lips to the back of his neck. She _had _to get a response out of him somehow.

Harry closed his eyes at the feeling of her lips on his skin again. He was being foolish thinking that he needed to go shag someone new. They had only slept together twice, but Harry knew that Hermione would be the only woman to ever touch him like this. That's why he hadn't been able to go through with it with other girls. Internally, he would always be wishing for Hermione.

Harry turned around and stared down at Hermione with a guarded look. He wanted to know why she was doing this. Did she really miss him? Or was she only worried that he was depressed and needed a 'pick-me-up'? Would she realize after that, yet again, they had made a huge mistake and curse him for it? Would she continue to regret them?

"Did you miss me?" she asked timidly. Again, Harry didn't respond. She was wearing the 'shy look' again- the one that drove him absolutely crazy with desire.

Just as he was contemplating if he should kiss her as a response, Hermione leaned forward on her tip toes and brushed her lips against his.

Hermione only pulled away a half inch when it was over; enough space to stare Harry straight in the eyes. Surprisingly, the guarded, unsure look in his eyes vanished. Now they looked quite soft and vulnerable. Hermione was greatly reminded of the boy she had spent seven years getting to know, trust, and love. She knew that the insecurity present in his eyes was due to the hurtful things she had said to him last time, but she was determined to make it up to him.

Their lips gravitated back together and before either of them knew it, Hermione was threading her fingers through his hair and he was pushing through the seal of her lips with his tongue.

---

**Are things starting to look up? Please review, and let me know your opinion. **

**:]]**


	5. Chapter 5

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter Five

_---_

_Last chapter:_

_Their lips gravitated back together and before either of them knew it, Hermione was threading her fingers through his hair and he was pushing through the seal of her lips with his tongue. _

_---_

Harry threw all rational thoughts to the wind as he started pushing Hermione back towards the bed. He could barely recognize her lifting his shirt over his head, and wasn't sure when he thought to start unbuttoning her trousers.

By the time they fell back on the bed, both of their tops were gone, and each had eagerly kicked their shoes to the floor. Harry moved over her as they positioned themselves more on the center of the bed.

He broke the kiss as Hermione's hands went back to his pants, pushing them down as efficiently as she could. His mouth trailed down over her cheek, and passed over the spot right underneath her jaw that always made her shudder.

Sure enough, a shiver ran down Hermione's spine. Harry felt this, and suddenly sat up on his knees to pull off her own jeans. He needed her. Now.

It wasn't long before they were both completely free of their clothes. Harry kissed her hard on the lips before moving in between her legs, and entering her.

Hermione let out a gasp of pleasure, the pain she'd been accustomed to feel a few weeks ago, totally gone. Now it was purely ecstasy she felt as he pushed in and out of her.

Her eyes rolled back slightly and she let out a short pant as Harry thrusted faster than ever. She knew this was wrong, but it felt too good. That was all she could focus on as her pleasure boiled inside her.

It was when Harry's wet lips brushed over her ear, that she let out her cry of release. Harry wasn't too far behind.

With a hoarse groan, he collapsed on top of her and dropped his head between her neck and shoulder. They were both still breathing hard, so Harry regained some of his strength before speaking.

"So… I'm guessing that this really does mean something to you?" he asked, rolling onto his side next to her.

"Yes Harry, it does," Hermione answered him quietly, though she was still trying to regain her breath. Didn't he understand that she wouldn't be able to have sex with him if it didn't? Of course she wasn't that shallow! But then again, she was cheating on Ron… so perhaps Harry's confusion wasn't so dim.

Harry propped himself up on his elbow so that he could look at her properly, "You've really missed me?"

"Every day," she whispered, her eyes now closed.

"Have you kissed Ron like the way you kiss me?"

"Can we please not talk about him? Let's not ruin the night-"

"Answer the question, Hermione," Harry said sternly. No matter how awkward they might've been to say, he needed her answers.

She sighed, obviously now frustrated, "No. Okay? It's never that passionate."

Harry couldn't wipe the smile off his face, "How come, do you think?"

"What's with the twenty questions Harry? Why can't you just enjoy the moment with me?" Hermione asked, giving him an exasperated look. Was he trying to make her feel worse? She felt guilty that when she wasn't with him he was upset, but now he was making her feel guilty for not having stronger feelings for Ron! What was he getting at?

"I need to hear your answers," Harry voiced his earlier thought.

Hermione shook her head, "I honestly don't know. Maybe it's because he's trying not to overwhelm me. He can be pretty gentlemanly when he wants to be…"

"I thought you said he had been pushing you for sex though?"

She bit her lip and shrugged lightly, "I mean, he sort of has-"

"Do you think you'll ever give in to him?" Harry asked, his eyes burning down into hers.

"What?" Hermione asked, completely appalled.

"Ron's still a virgin Hermione. I've seen the way he leers at you. The bloke has a one track mind, and unfortunately you're on the end of it. How do you feel about that?"

She shook her head quickly, still revolted by his bluntness. "I-I don't know, Harry! Weird, I guess. To be honest, I prefer just not to think about it."

"Why so?" he continued unabashedly.

Hermione let out a heated breath through her nose. She couldn't believe she was actually about to admit this to him. Through gritted teeth, she spoke, "Because when I think about having sex, it always includes you somehow."

Harry gave her a lopsided grin that made her heart flutter. She gave him a mocking look, "Are you happy now?"

Harry only continued to smile, "Why do you think you only think about me?"

"Because you're the only guy I've done it with," she shrugged, finding that to be a decent enough answer.

"The only guy you'll ever want to do it with?" Harry asked.

That time, Hermione sat up straight, clutching the covers over her bare chest, "I-I- what?! How can you expect me to answer that?"

"Honestly," he shrugged simply. "Do you see yourself being with me in a year's time? In ten?"

Hermione gave him a wide-eyed look, "Harry…"

"Can you see yourself being married to Ron?"

Hermione stared at him. That answer was surprisingly easy to sort out, "No."

Harry nodded quietly, before sitting up next to her. He didn't reach for her, but stared her full-on in the eyes, "I plan on being with the girl I love in a year and ten years time, Hermione. I don't want a bloke to get in the way of that, especially if they don't love the girl as much as I do, and if she doesn't love him."

"What?" Hermione gasped, "Lo- H-Harry…" she stuttered, eyeing him unsurely. She began shaking her head back and forth slightly, giving him a pleading look while trying to keep from crying, "Please Harry, don't say it."

"I love you." Hermione bit her lip. If only he had admitted that to her a year or two ago… she would have been over the moon to hear it then, "Can you really, honestly, without me answering for you, say the same for Ron?"

"I-I don't know…"

Harry nodded, not relenting his gaze. Maybe he'd been deluding himself thinking he'd hear something different from her. But if she really didn't know, he wasn't going to wait around and torture himself while she tried to figure it out. "Well find out. Then maybe we can talk about where this is going." He threw the covers off him and slid out of his bed, searching around on the ground for his clothes.

"What do you mean?" she asked behind him with a worried frown.

Harry rolled his eyes at her inability to grasp what he was telling her. Was she trying to fake stupid on purpose? "I don't want just a taste of you, Hermione," he muttered, finding his boxers and pulling them on, "I want the whole thing."

"What if you regret it?" she asked quietly after a few seconds.

Harry shook his head, "That isn't possible. After all I've been through, I know exactly what I want. What I need. And that doesn't include me being your bloke on the side."

"Harry…"

By that point, Harry had already pulled his trousers on, and had his shirt in his hand. He walked over to the door, and turned once he was there. "I got to go. Think about what I said."

Hermione didn't have a chance to call after him, because by then he'd already taken off down the hallway. And even if she could, she didn't know what she'd say to him. She didn't want to lie to him, and tell him everything he wanted to hear when the truth of the matter was that she just didn't know what she was feeling. Obviously, she had feelings for him. But when she concentrated on it, she had feelings for Ron too.

Yes, it was very different being with Harry. It was effortless, almost, when he wasn't being a hounding ass. Other than that… it was natural.

With Ron, however, she had to try to have a good time with him. She had to tell herself not to comment on things she normally would've around him, or not to talk about things he'd have a hard time understanding while she was with him. They didn't have much in common, really. She'd thought the answer to that, though, was that opposites attract. She'd always thought that'd been a good thing. But was it really? Her and Harry had plenty of things in common. She could talk to him, and not have to worry about him not understanding something. He got her more than Ron did.

But did that matter? She and Ron were alright together when she did try. Maybe she was being selfish.

But was it really being selfish, when she could have something… better?

Because that's what it would be with Harry. It'd be better. Happier. Easier.

Passionate.

The way that Harry had said that he loved her… it did crazy things to her. She'd dreamt of hearing that come from him, but that was a long time ago. She was only a silly girl then, with a crush on her best friend, because he was the first boy who'd been nice to her. He was the first boy she'd ever truly cared about.

And with Ron… well, he's told her that too. But it was different when he said it. She couldn't get that same spark of adrenaline when she remembered Ron saying it. Did that mean something? Or was this all in her imagination?

No. What she has with Ron was an actual relationship. That was real. And what she has with Harry… Well, she's clearly not supposed to have it, but that doesn't make it any less real. To be honest, it was far more real than anything she'd ever experienced with Ron. And that was what scared her the most.

Was it possible? Could she have the actual relationship and the spark of adrenaline, too? Didn't she owe it to herself to find out? Or would the cost be too great?

Harry's words played over in her head. He wanted to be with the woman he loved in ten year's time, not beating around the bush in some illegitimate scandal. And if Hermione couldn't see herself marrying Ron, then what was she doing, really?

Maybe Harry's questions weren't as ludicrous as she originally thought. With a shuddering sigh, Hermione fell back into the pillows. She tried to picture Ron kissing up her neck, the way Harry had earlier that night. She tried to imagine his hands unbuttoning her trousers and slipping inside…

Instantly, her face soured and her legs snapped shut. That- that was Harry's territory. It wouldn't seem right with Ron on top of her instead.

Quickly, Hermione shook her head, trying to clear away the images. Maybe Harry's question was easier to answer than she thought.

It was true- she did have love for Ron. But Harry… she just loved him. It was the most complicated 'plain and simple' feeling she had. Why wait to possibly one day fall in love with Ron, when she had these feelings, and many more, now, with Harry?

---

Harry walked quietly back into his room a few hours later. The light was off, so he figured that Hermione had left after he did. Figures. She was getting good at running away from him.

Maybe that was his fault, for being so pushy with her. But he couldn't help it. He wanted so badly for her to see what he saw… to feel the way he felt… Sure it was selfish, but what else could he do? Sit back and wait for her to realize that she'd rather be with him more? That Ron didn't love her properly, and that he loved her like he had never loved anything else in his life? How long would it take for her to see those things without his pushing? Could he really wait?

He sighed loudly, knowing that was a silly question. Of course he'd wait. What else did he have to do in life?

"Harry?"

Harry snapped his head back in the direction of his bed. It was completely covered in shadows, but he could make out Hermione sitting up, in the exact same spot he had left her in.

"Hermione?" he asked, almost in awe.

"Yeah." Hermione twisted on the bed and reached over to turn on his bedside lamp. Once a dim light filled the room, she turned back to him with a shy look on her face. She'd been running over her speech ever since she'd made her decision, but now that he was here, staring at her with his burning eyes, her calculated words all seemed to fall apart.

"What are you doing here?" Harry asked, noticing that she had put her tank top back on, and that her hair looked slightly more frazzled.

Hermione bit her lip and shrugged, "Waiting for you."

"Why?"

She shifted, "Well, I thought about what you said…"

He didn't let on, but his heart suddenly started racing. Unnoticeably, he swallowed, "And?"

Hermione stared up into his darkened eyes for a moment. The speech she had prepared was all but now a distant memory. Nevertheless, she couldn't back down now. She'd just have to speak from the heart. Her eyes closed for the briefest moment before she opened them again, and stared bravely up at him.

"I can't see into the future, Harry. That's why I don't know where we'll all be in ten years time…"

Harry was starting to narrow his eyes, anticipating the start to a rejection. But then she continued, "But I do know what I hope to achieve within ten years."

"What do you hope to achieve?" he asked in a whisper.

"I want to finish school, and earn the highest degree possible. I don't want a job that just earns someone money or a good reputation- I really want to help people. I want to help little orphans like you used to be…"

Harry had to smile at that. It was so Hermione. She'd be perfect at doing something like that. Harry listened with renewed vigor as she continued, "In ten years, I hope to be married, and on my way to starting a family with the man I chose to love for the rest of my life."

Harry blinked a few times, not exactly expecting that response from her. Still though, she hadn't come out and said _who_ that man was. That meant she was either telling him that she loved him too, or she was trying to let him off easy.

"And what of the best friend?" Harry asked. He wanted to just shake the answer out of her already, but he figured that wouldn't be the best approach in their current situation.

Hermione took a deep breath, staring at Harry longingly. Finally she spoke, "Ron will be happy for us. He might hate us for a while, but by ten years he'll have found someone to love for himself. It won't have to be a competition for him to be happy."

Harry's heart was pounding. He wanted to lean in and smother her with kisses, but still she hadn't openly admitted those three little words yet.

"What are you saying to me, Hermione?" he asked, fighting down his excitement.

Hermione let out a deep breath, "If I give my heart to you, will you break it?"

"I can guarantee you that I won't."

Hermione nodded, "Then it's yours. I love you, Harry."

Everything else seemed to disappear around him. He'd spent all night wondering when she would finally admit it to him, and now here they were- she was sitting there as beautiful as ever, confessing her love for _him_. Harry could hardly believe it.

"Really?" he asked, not even bothering to contain his smile.

Hermione nodded once more before scooting forward on the bed. She reached forward, grabbing Harry's shirt and pulled him down to her lips.

Harry kissed her back eagerly for a few moments, before gently pulling away, "Are you going to be with me, then?"

Was it wrong to expect an automatic yes? However, when Hermione sighed, Harry knew it wouldn't be that easy.

"Harry…"

Harry groaned and pulled his face from Hermione's grasp. It seemed like running in circles was all he could manage with this girl.

"Just give me some time," she defended herself quickly, sitting up on her knees so she was closer to eye level with him. "I know that's not what you want to hear, but I need you to trust me. I just want to let Ron see for himself that we're not right for each other. Then after that, hopefully it'll be easy for him to see us together."

"You want to let _him_ break up with _you_?" Harry asked skeptically.

Hermione nodded with a knowing expression, "I know it sounds stupid, but look at it from my point of view. You guys are best mates, and I will not have that be ruined over me."

Harry was confused over how to feel. Hermione was always very considerate to other people's feelings. And what did it matter? She just confessed her love to him. He trusted that she wasn't going to do anything with Ron to jeopardize that.

On the other hand, he knew that he and Ron had been growing apart the last few months anyway. It wouldn't _really_ make that much of a difference if he were to find out now? But then again, Harry had only been avoiding Ron because he was constantly with Hermione. Truth be told, he really did miss his other best friend.

"A few weeks is all I'm asking," Hermione said again, a hopeful look in her eye.

Harry raked a hand through his messy hair, "What if it takes him more than a few weeks to let go of you?"

"I won't wait any longer than necessary," Hermione answered quickly, shaking her head, "I promise."

"It's hard to be patient," Harry muttered, glancing away from her eyes in frustration.

"I know… but we will be together eventually," Hermione suddenly shot him a teasing smile, "And then you'll find it hard to get rid of me."

Harry scoffed and pulled her up against his chest, "Not likely."

Hermione grinned before quickly seeking out his lips. Snaking her arms around his neck and pulling him back, on top of her, was starting to become a practiced fashion with them. Just as it was for him to quickly find the hem of her shirt, and tug it forward so he wouldn't have to be deprived of her skin, and for her to start undoing his belt buckle.

Hermione sucked in a hard breath as Harry's lips passed over the sensitive part on her neck.

If this is what it felt like to be with him in secret, she wondered how amazing it would be when no one cared that they were together. They would have absolutely nothing holding them back, and that thought excited her more than she thought imaginable. One thing was for sure, Hermione didn't want to have to miss out on that for too much longer.

---

**REVIEW**, or I'll find you…

And then ask you to nicely leave a comment. ;]


	6. Chapter 6

**JKR owns.**

**Just Decide**

Chapter Six

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**[AN]** This is the curveball chapter. Unfortunately, things aren't going to be as smooth sailing for them as they might've thought last night. Muah. Muahahaha.

---

(Harry's flat; 9:27 a.m.)

Hermione let out a soft yawn as she stretched, arching her back into the hard body behind hers. Her eyes refused to open as she rolled over and buried her face into the shoulder of the warm, hard, now chuckling body.

Harry's arms tightened around her, "Hey."

"Morning," she mumbled back.

"Did you sleep okay?"

Hermione grinned, "You mean with what little sleep we got?"

"I didn't hear you complaining."

"That's because I wasn't."

Harry smiled, and leaned in to kiss her.

"What time is it?"

"Um," Harry turned his head to glance at the digital clock on his nightstand, "Almost 9:30."

"Damn it…" Hermione muttered, turning to lay on her back and putting a hand over her face.

"What's wrong?" Harry asked, worried, perhaps, that she was already going back to the method of being ashamed with them. He would literally shake her in frustration if he heard an excuse like that again.

She sighed and sat up so that she could look at him properly, "I have class at ten. All of my books and notes are still at home."

Harry nodded, trying to hide his relief. So she wasn't going back on the conversation they'd had last night, only scared that she'll be late for class. Typical Hermione. "Are you going to go and get them?"

"I don't want to, but I'll have to. We have an exam today."

"What'd you tell your parents last time?" Harry asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

A wry little grin tugged at the corner of Hermione's lips, "That I was doing an all night research binge with one of my friends from class."

Harry laughed, "I bet they easily believed you."

"I don't know, I was pretty frazzled when I got home," Hermione said thoughtfully, remembering the night she had categorized as the best of her life, but then the horrible morning that had followed. After a moment she simply shrugged, "I just don't think they wanted to call me out on their assumptions. They're just grateful that I didn't move out after…"

Harry nodded in understanding, fighting down the hedge of guilt, "Yeah. Well, do you want some breakfast before you go?"

Hermione grinned, not able to deny the hint of excitement in his tone, "Yeah, sure."

Harry returned her smile before jumping out of bed, and pulling her out with him. When they arrived in the kitchen and looked into the refrigerator, Harry realized what meager amounts of food he had been living with. After giving Hermione a sheepish look, she shook her head playfully and grabbed the last of his eggs. Within ten minutes, they had a pretty decent meal going.

"So, what are you going to do today?" Hermione asked, biting into an apple.

Harry shrugged, "I don't know. Probably go buy some groceries and then wait for you to get back from your class."

The smile slowly fell from Hermione's face, "Harry, you know, Ron usually meets me after class…"

"Oh. What do you guys usually do?" he asked, realizing for the first time that he had no idea what their relationship was like. He knew they didn't do much of the physical stuff, fortunately, but what else did they have in common to do? Nothing really…

Hermione shrugged, "We go out to eat sometimes. We've been visiting George in Diagon Alley a lot. If not that, then we're usually just at the Burrow."

"That sounds truly fascinating. How could you ever want to give that up?" Harry asked sarcastically. Hermione gave him a narrowing look and flung some of her scrambled eggs at him.

Harry dodged the flying food and snickered, "So after that, will you come over?"

"I'll probably go home first."

"Later tonight then?" Harry persisted. After all the head way they'd made, he didn't want to go one night without seeing her.

"Definitely."

Harry grinned before leaning in and kissing her. He couldn't describe how great it felt that she wanted it as much as he did.

"I got to go," Hermione mumbled between the kiss.

Harry grabbed her face and pulled her in for one last deep kiss before taking a step back.

"Good luck on your test," he said with a wry smile.

Hermione shook her head slightly and tried to regain her breathing, "Yeah you too."

Harry chortled and Hermione swatted him hard on the shoulder. She kissed him one last time on the cheek, before she disapparated right in front of him.

…

(Hermione's bedroom; 9:51 a.m.)

"Hermione?"

Hermione glanced up to find her mother standing in her open doorway. She sighed, before turning back to the mess of books and papers on the ground. She had hoped to evade her parents this morning, but apparently her mum had heard her standard crack of apparition when she suddenly popped into her bedroom a few minutes ago. Hermione had been searching around for her school texts for the past couple minutes, trying to hurry out of her house as soon as she possibly could.

Hopefully her mum would notice the frenzy she was in. "I can't talk mum, I'm almost late for physiology!"

Tabitha Granger nodded absently before placing her daughter with a peculiar look, "Where were you last night?"

"I was studying with my lab partners again. Where the hell is my bag?" Hermione muttered, turning away from her mother and quickly looking under her bed for her book bag. She knew it wouldn't be under there, but she really needed to hide her face from her mum, especially after the lie she just gave her. Hermione's mother was probably the most observant woman in all of England. She could spot a lie from a mile away.

She knew Tabitha was still staring at her as she straightened from beneath her bed and looked over by her closet. She noticed her bag hanging on her closet doorknob, and with a sigh of relief- mixed with apprehension- she got up to go retrieve it. Sure enough, inside were her physiology books, along with the other binders she'd need for class.

Now that her books were secured, all she had to worry about was getting past her relentless mother.

"Why didn't you keep your books with you?"

"Because, I didn't need my physiology books for biology, mum."

"Wait a second," Tabitha said, placing her arm across the door frame as Hermione tried to walk past her, "Hermione, what's going on with you?"

"What?" Hermione asked, hoping to throw her mother off, "Nothing…"

"You haven't been yourself lately," Tabitha argued, "And this is twice that you haven't come home from being out-"

"Mum, it was for school."

Tabitha gave her an unconvinced look before continuing, "Your father and I didn't think you and Ron were serious-"

Hermione nearly choked on her own breath, "Mum, I wasn't with Ron!"

"Are things getting serious between you two?" Tabitha asked, as if she hadn't even heard Hermione's vehement protest.

"No," Hermione said, fixing her mum with a stubborn glare. Honestly, this was the last thing she bloody needed. She was fighting off guilt and confusion at all angles- she didn't need her mum to butt in and cause more strife in her life.

"Hermione, all I ask is that you be honest with me. If it's that you're not ready to tell your father, I-"

"Mum, I'm not doing anything like _that_ with Ron. I promise you, I was studying with Angela and Rachel."

Tabitha sighed. The two Granger women were in a stalemate, and when that happened, you couldn't expect for the argument to get settled any time soon.

"I'm late," Hermione said, hoping that that would do the trick and get her mum to move. Tabitha, however, sucked in a deep breath, and gave her a wide-eyed look.

"For school!" Hermione quickly corrected. Her mother placed a hand over her heart and let out the breath she had been holding. By now, Hermione was frustrated beyond belief. Tabitha was already starting to make her feel the guilt that she had hoped to keep locked away for a bit longer.

Another minute ticked off on her watch. Hermione spared Tabitha another glance before she disapparated on the spot.

…

(University of Westminster; 1:17 p.m.)

Hermione trotted down the steps of her physiology class room. Luckily, she was able to concentrate on the exam within the first few questions. She was sure she had lived up to her normal standards, and now her stress at the conversation with her mother and getting to school on time was relocated towards seeing Ron.

How the hell was she going to be able to look him in the eye? With Harry, it was easy to forget about all of her problems. She couldn't really focus on anyone but him when he was that close. But now that they were temporarily separated, Hermione was left to fend for herself.

And the predator was closing in on her, wearing a big grin and holding a brown paper bag, soaked with grease spots.

"Hey babe!" Ron greeted her suddenly, leaving her no time to divert his kiss. His lips were sticky against hers, and they pulled away with a loud _smack_.

"How was it?"

Hermione cleared her throat awkwardly, and pretended to scratch an itch on her nose so that she didn't have to look him in the eyes. She took the opportunity to wipe the grease from her lips, "Um, good. I think I did fairly well on the exam-"

"You're feeling better, right?" Ron asked, as if he hadn't even heard her.

"Er, I guess. Why?"

"Because we're going out tonight! We have to celebrate!"

Hermione frowned. Was he drunk or something? Since when did he find her good grades a reason to celebrate? "Ron, it's fine."

"What? No," his confused question was replaced by his previous excited demeanor, "Guess what Charlie told me today?"

"Oh. What is it?"

"Some people from the Russian Ministry of Magic got in touch with Mr. Inkwell. They wanted his services to provide a few dragons for their royal, magical, ballet thingy. Mr. Inkwell said yes and is putting Charlie and someone else in charge of the dragons. Guess who's going to Russia!"

Hermione raised her eyebrows, neither skeptically or in awe. It was more shocked, "You?"

Ron looked like he was fighting off the urge to jump up and down and clap, "Yeah! I'm being put in charge of three full grown dragons!"

Hermione frowned. What was this Mr. Inkwell playing at? Ron had only _helped_ Charlie and his team get the one dragon back in Gringotts. Did he really find Ron qualified of being partnered with Charlie and being put in charge of three dragons? Ron was bound to get injured!

And then she thought of something else that gave her all the more reasons to feel like shit. He was going to Russia. So much for working on making him see that they're not right for each other…

"So how long will you be gone for?" she asked, considerably less excited than she knew she should've appeared to be.

"Two weeks. Maybe more, maybe less."

Hermione stopped walking. She'd expected a few days, but weeks?! He was going to be gone for more or less two bloody _weeks_? Anguish crashed down upon her. Harry was going to want to kill her…

"That- that's…"

"It's great, right?!" Ron exclaimed, unaware of her gloom, "This gets me out of shuffling muggle documents with Dad. I think this is my big break!"

"But Ron, before this you never really expressed feelings for wanting to work with dragons. What about training for quidditch?"

Ron shrugged, "Quidditch trials aren't for another few months. This is happening now, and it's probably the coolest thing ever! You're happy for me right?"

Hermione sighed. She wasn't happy, but he couldn't know that, "Yeah. I mean, I'm sad you're leaving but… if this is what you want."

"It is. And I know two weeks seems like a lot of time, but we can't spend every waking moment together, right?" he finished with a laugh. She couldn't help but raise her eyebrow, and tried to keep from snorting. That was true, more than he knew…

Hermione didn't realize that Ron was wrapping his arms around her waist until he tugged her forward suddenly. He tried to sound teasing, "When I get back, you can show me how much you really missed me."

Hermione looked away from him. He was going to make her mission bloody impossible if he kept acting like this, "We'll see, Ron."

Ron surprised her yet again when he suddenly tilted his head forward and kissed her. Hermione struggled to kiss him back, even though it was as uncomfortable as all hell. _You are technically still his girl,_ she guiltily thought.

"So do you want to come back to the Burrow with me and help me pack?"

"Sure," Hermione agreed blankly. He smiled at her, not detecting the signs of misery and guilt spreading over her face. Hermione knew that she wouldn't get to escape the distressing emotions until later that night. At least, hopefully she would.

…

The hours spent packing with Ron at the Burrow had gone by dismally slow. Hermione couldn't stop thinking about Harry, and how he was going to react when he found out that Ron was going away for a few weeks.

After begging off Mrs. Weasley's home cooked dinner, she immediately took off to Harry's flat. She refused to admit her weakness with the fear that'd she be classified as having the same lovesick characteristics as Ginny, but honestly, she had missed him terribly today.

She disapparated to the foyer of Harry's flat. Instantly she heard footsteps coming to greet her.

"There you are… I almost thought you'd changed your mind- what's wrong?" he asked as he met her in the hallway. He gave her a quizzical look to counter her tense one, fearing that he had said the 'almost' part too soon.

Hermione started ringing her hands together. She figured the sooner she got this over with, the better, "Um, I have good news and bad news."

Harry blinked, "What is it?"

"Well, the bad news is… Ron's going out of town for a few weeks." She went deafly silent as soon as she finished, waiting for his impending reaction.

Harry narrowed his eyes, "That's bad news?"

Given his tone, he had misunderstood what she was trying to say. Hermione quickly shook her head, "No- it's just that now I won't be able to try and convince him that… you know…"

Harry shrugged, "He's coming back in a few weeks. Can't you just start trying then?"

Hermione stared at him for a second, before kicking back into gear, "Of course! I was just worried that you'd be upset… I mean this pushes everything back, and I initially said I'd only need a few weeks."

Harry nodded quietly in understanding. Obviously that was annoying, but he'd deal with it since he had to. He gave her a hesitant look, "What's the good news?"

"Well, Ron's going to be out of town for a few weeks…" Hermione muttered, biting her lip. She wasn't trying to sound sexy or anything, but she couldn't deny her own excitement at that prospect.

A smile spread over Harry's face as he took a few steps closer to her, "So this doesn't change your mind?"

"No. I still want to be with you."

"That's all that matters then," Harry whispered, before pulling her into the kiss he'd been waiting for all bloody day long.

---

**Remember to review! They've been declining lately, and it makes me stay up late at night, wondering why…**


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